I was walking down a country road, suspecting nothing, when I noticed something strange laying by the roadside. Grayish and slightly crushed, with winding grooves. Curiosity got the best of me, so I cautiously poked it with a stick and examined it thoroughly. Inside, there were many small parts, similar to a chopped brain. The texture was rubbery. Awful.
Honestly, I shuddered. I wondered, “What if it’s a brain?” Maybe from an animal? Or — terrible to consider — a human? My heart began thumping. In dread and confusion, I took a picture of it and uploaded it online with the following caption: “What is this?” I found it on the road. It looks like a brain. Should I call the police?”
Comments poured in swiftly. Some speculated it might be a mushroom. Others assumed it was the interior of a wild animal. But one woman — who, based on her profile, owned numerous dogs — cleared everything up. Her response was simple yet devastatingly accurate:
“You discovered and opened dog crap. Someone’s dog ate a lot of paper towels. Dogs cannot digest that, resulting in a terrible creation.
I felt humiliated and amused. Embarrassed by my wild fantasies. I’m amused because I almost called the cops about a feces stuffed with paper towels.
